104. out of the box
The funny thing about freedom is that it allows us to create our own prisons, it’s just that we call it choice. We can do anything at anytime, but most of us inevitably settle for choosing an ideology that we feel best represents us, or a routine that comforts us. We lock onto that one thing, and it becomes us. The popular views, thoughts, and methods surrounding our particular choice define the way we see and approach the world. Pretty soon we’re locked into a certain perspective, running the risk of blinding ourselves to unforeseen possibilities.
It’s good to have the freedom to choose something that inspires us and provides purpose but it’s important to know that it can become detrimental if we lock ourselves into a certain perspective. If we’re stuck within a certain mindset, location, routine, relationship, methodology, or way of doing things, we never allow ourselves to experience the world we’re missing. Often times, what we’re missing is the very thing that can take our lives to new heights. So do what you love, but get out of the box you’ve created so that you can gain a new appreciation of what you have or new perspective on what you’ve never considered.
103. inconsequential changes
What happens when you rely too heavily on the rituals we have in place? Be it the way you get ready for work in the morning, the way you take to the office, or the way you complete your daily tasks. We all sink into a certain way to do things, but what happens when one inconsequential thing changes? The water isn’t working for your morning shower, or the most efficient route to work is closed for construction, or the machine you use to complete your work at the office is on the fritz. It’s time to rethink your ritual.
There’s a story about a monk who would lead his followers in meditation, but just as everyone was reaching their flow states, they would be disrupted by a cat wandering through the temple, purring and meowing for attention. The solution was simple, tie the cat up outside prior to the session so that no one would be bothered during their meditations. This ritual went on for so long that when the cat eventually died, a spiritual crisis emerged. The followers were unsure how to carry out a meditation session without tying up the cat.
Sounds foolish, but like the monks, we are all perfectly capable of meditating without the cat, as well as successfully getting through any obstacle our day poses. Even if we don’t realize it, just because our sense of normalcy has been disrupted doesn’t mean we can’t figure out a way to move forward. We often create self-imposed limitations with our rituals and defend them because that’s how they’ve always been done. Whether it’s due to our long held rituals, our culture, our education, our skill set, our time, or our budget, we talk ourselves out of being able to complete something simply because something inconsequential is challenging our idea of how everything should be working. However, if you argue for these limitations, the unfortunate part is that you get to keep them.
102. risk vs reward
A lion faces a choice when it’s hungry. It can easily hunt for a mouse, or attempt to take down the larger antelope. The decision comes down to risk versus reward. While the lion is fully capable of taking down either, the mouse is the easier option, although the energy required to do so exceeds the caloric content of the mouse itself. Therefore, making this decision too often won’t lead to longterm fulfillment or growth. On the other hand, choosing to go after the antelope is the riskier option, requiring more effort and planning due to its greater size and strength, but will provide days worth of food if successful.
Think of the lion choosing its meal as a metaphor for the choices we make in our lives. Too often people are going after mice because it’s a sure thing, instead of the riskier but far more fulfilling antelope. Assuming that if we decide to go for the antelope — or the thing that is most fulfilling to us — we might be met with failure and go hungry. So we don’t take the risk of starting a new business, we don’t take the risk of asking that person out, we don’t take the risk of committing to lifestyle change to acquire the health and body we desire because we are afraid to fail. We stay small by working the job that pays the bills, by staying “in our league”, and by yo-yo dieting. We only go after the small things because we’re only focused on not losing, instead of playing to win.
101. watch where your resources flow
What is the easiest way to know if the strategy you’re implementing will be successful? Watch where your resources flow. Whether it’s time, money, attention, or love — it really comes down to how you allocate your resources that will determine the outcome. If you want to be in shape, but choose to spend the majority of your free time watching Netflix and eating takeout, those 30 minutes a day spent at the gym aren’t going to amount to much. If you want to be in a relationship, but choose to take that person for granted by treating them as though they will always be there, those times you find it necessary to say “I love you” will eventually mean less and less. You might think you’re a dedicated person because you choose to go to the gym for 30 minutes a day, or only choose loving words when you feel its necessary, but the outcomes of those strategies are only going to result in failure. The expectations of these strategies aren’t aligned with the reality of the situation. If the decision you make about where you want to invest your mind, body, and heart aren’t consistent with the person you’re aspiring to be or the things you want to accomplish, you’ll never become that person who accomplishes those things.
100. paint your canvas
Too often we try to be someone we’re not. We take the canvas we’re given when we come into this world and paint it according to how we think we can best achieve the love and acceptance we’re after. We follow people we admire or want to be like, applying the brush strokes to the canvas just as they did, without realizing that no one goes to the museum to look at another version of an already famous painting. It’s the pieces of ourselves we suppress while trying to model the picture of our lives after someone else’s that are the exact things we need to emphasize on our canvas to find the love and acceptance we’re after. Whether it’s because of fear or societal pressures, the parts of ourselves we’re most afraid to show are the very things that make us unique. And, if we can find the confidence, it’s those peculiar differences that will earn you a place on the wall. Find confidence to beautifully paint the canvas you’re given.
99. find joy in the process
Every time you find yourself unhappy, it’s most likely due to some form of comparison. We’re never really upset until we start comparing where we are with where we think we should be. It’s a formula for dissatisfaction that leaves us more concerned with the result of our effort, than finding enjoyment within the process itself.
Focusing on the result, instead of enjoying the process itself is a form of comparison between the future and current versions of yourself. Placing all your attention on the result, at the expense of the processes will only lead to dissatisfaction in the long run because you haven’t learned to enjoy all the things that were necessary to achieve the desired results, which will ultimately lead to you losing them. For instance, you can compare yourself to someone who is consistently in good shape. You can ask them what you need to do to look good naked, and then follow their prescribed regimen to achieve the body you desire, but if you do not find a majority of the effort within the process enjoyable, you won’t have that body for long.
There are two types of people; ones that think they will only be happy when they achieve what they’re after, and ones who find happiness in the execution of the process. If you are embarking on a journey only as a means to an end, you’ll never find joy in the steps it took to get you there. It is an inevitability that if you enjoy what you’re doing, you will get better results. Long after you achieve your goal or arrive at your destination, you’re still doing many of the things there were necessary to get you there simply because you enjoy them.
Research has shown that you derive more satisfaction — dopamine — from the process of pursuing than actually acquiring the things you’re after. In other words, the people who find enjoyment in the process will have the best results longterm, whereas those who are only after a result will quickly lose interest once they achieve what they’re after. The person who is consistently in shape enjoys the process of working out and eating well because it provides them with a positive feedback mechanism of confidence, vibrancy, and looking good naked, that allows them to consistently find enjoyment within the process. If you hate working out and eating well, and must sacrifice to get the body you want, you can achieve it but it is unlikely you will maintain it.
98. affluence without abundance
We inherently know that more isn’t always better, but this is contrary to everything we been told to live by in our culture. To be happy, you need more school, more career advancement, more money, more friends, more attention, and more material possessions. And even when you have it all, you never really achieve the happiness you were promised.
We are consistently hung up on not having enough, so we create a story within our head that speaks toward inadequacy. “If I only had this much money…” “If I only had this new thing…” “If I only had the body I wanted, I’d be happy.” It’s unfortunate that we are conditioned to believe we are never enough simply because we don’t have enough. And this comes from the narrative we’ve been sold, written by the companies who thrive off our search for happiness as they exploit our thoughts of inadequacy.
If the story you’re being told isn’t making you happy, it’s time to create a new story. The prevailing idea of intentionally working a job you hate, to buy things we don’t need, to impress people we don’t care about, should be replaced with working hard enough at something you enjoy, to provide the things you need, for the people you care about. These are fundamentally different approaches; one breeds a lifetime of inadequacy, stress, poor health and heartbreak, while the other finds fulfillment, love and happiness in the things that truly matter. It’s affluence without abundance.
97. live in the present
We live most of our lives in our head. Thinking and worrying about the consequences of what might come from our past decisions and future actions. Rarely are we ever present in the moment. We are really only anxious about what might be, but never what is. The anxiety that comes from contemplating whether or not you should kiss that person, the response you’ll receive from a work presentation, or what will happen once you step on stage to perform is all extinguished in the moment. There is no longer what if, only what is. We worry about the past and future, but all there is, is now. The funny thing is that worrying is a form of praying for what you don’t want. If you are consistently anxious about underperforming or failing, there is a greater likelihood that will happen because you are bringing so much attention to it. If you think about the last time you were worried about something you had to do, you’ll probably remember all the negative thoughts that existed before and after, but never during. You can’t be afraid in the moment because your mind is focused on performing, not analyzing. If we know that our best effort is made without worry, why do we continue to allow the ghosts of consequence to creep in?
96. rounding the edges
The professionals we choose to listen to and the people we choose to pay attention to, are often at the extremes of their craft. Why? Because they dive deep into a subject and uncover things that people in the middle tend to miss. They are intriguing, simply because they chose to passionately explore something they love without the burden of paying attention to things that don’t matter to them. Their captive attention allows them to become the best, and is seen in the creative knowledge on display as a result of their efforts.
There’s a reason we gravitate towards these people when we are looking for a coach, a doctor, a graphic designer, a financial advisor, or any other profession really. It’s because we love what these people have to offer.
On the other hand, years of schooling and cultural indoctrination pushes the majority of us to fit in, to sand down the edges and become well rounded. When we went to school, it was better to have a bunch of B’s, than an A+ in one subject and D’s in another. We push children (who turn into adults of the same mentality) to focus on their D’s and ignore their A+. All the while, repeating the mantra “a Jack of all trades is a master of none.”
What could happen if you chose to follow something to the extreme? If you broke free from the paradigm of institutionalized mediocrity? If you chose to perfect the one thing you can do better than anyone else? That mentality is what the future hinges on.
95. complex systems
Systems are complex. Just look at the body. How much do you really know about what goes on in there? Probably, very little. Within complex systems, such as the body, or larger systems like the “Healthcare” system, processes can be so tightly coupled together that they’re often hidden from us. Yet, given enough time, certain things will express themselves and therefore be seen as normal (e.g., disease processes and rising Healthcare costs). In other words, what looks like a sudden traumatic event like a heart attack, or a freak accident like the complete failure of the “Healthcare” system to bolster people’s health, is just a normal expression of a flawed system over time.
The acceleration of stressful inputs we’ve seen placed onto an already broken system has sped up the eventual outcome — we’re all dying by subscribing to the “Healthcare” system. For those who choose to see it, these events are allowing us to see where the cracks are, both in how we individually have the power to capture health, as well as the failures of the “Healthcare” system at large. The disproportionate amount of stress placed on our flawed system is quickly bringing to light the faulty processes that many were previously unaware of, and may have taken another decade or so before they would have arisen organically. Tragic, but true.
If we can look at these freak events — i.e., the failure of the “Healthcare” system to create healthy people, instead of the walking dead who scour the earth surviving on meds — not as outliers, but completely normal outcomes of a flawed system, then we can understand it’s just part of the process. Think… it’s not a bug, it’s a feature! What we do with our newfound awareness will dictate the system we use to capture health in the future. We can learn from this because after all hindsight is 2020.
Where once we thought freak accidents happen, we can now understand how small things over time can have a large impact on system small and large. So, looking at all the things you know you need to do to get healthy, yet are able only to complete a fraction, don’t think you’re a failure because you only checked off 2 of the 10 things that have been recommended to you. Instead, appreciate the fact that those 2 positive things you’ve completed today impact 10 different things positively, just in subtly different ways that are hidden away within the larger system. In time, you’ll find greater health and find value in checking off more boxes so you can steer clear of any freak events in the future.
94. behavior change
How do you come to believe the things you believe about yourself? You popped into this world with no preconceived notions, so where did the idea of You come from? We can argue the concepts behind Nurture versus Nature, but both are instrumental in constructing the identity you have about yourself.
So how does our identity get shaped? Mostly, through repetition of whatever story you’ve constructed over the years and repeatedly told yourself. Your story is your identity. The habits you formed shaped that narrative, and reinforced your particular identity. Sometimes it can be positive; “I’m a caring and loving person.” Other times it can be negative; “I’m fat and everyone hates me.” But these are just the stories you tell yourself. The unfortunate thing is, whether good or bad, if you’re looking for something to validate your feelings, you’re going to find it. So, if you go into situations with a certain framework, you’ll come away with experiences that match the story you’re telling yourself and solidify it within your mind.
Every thought and action you take is a vote for the person you want to become. If you can master the right mindset, that allows you to establish the right habits, you will continuously cast a vote for the person you wish to become. Those small efforts, day-after-day serve to create major changes over time. You’re not going to transform your body by doing one push-up a day, just as you’re not going to become a published author by writing once a day, but each time you do, you cast a vote for the type of person that doesn’t miss workouts, or the daily practice of writing. And over time, you’ll become the person who is healthy and can write well enough to tell you about it.
It’s important to understand that the goal isn’t to lose weight, or to publish a book because once you do, you’re not pursuing behavior change anymore, you’re acting in alignment as to the type of person you already see yourself to be. True behavior change is really identity change. Once you change the internal story, it’s easier to show up as the person you want to be. And, at that point it’s no longer motivation that drives you; it’s actualization of “this is who I am now.”
93. oh, you’ve changed
Don’t get caught in the trap of worrying too much about what other people think. It’s a mistake because you’ll never really know what they think, only what they are willing to tell you. Often when people offer their opinion, they think they’re saying it on our behalf. They encourage you not to stretch or strive for something greater because they don’t want to be responsible for you if you fall. Who knows, maybe they see something you don’t. But, if the encouragement consistently falls on complacency, they are not helping you grow, and maybe you’ve outgrown certain people. It’s not a bad thing. People will say, “oh, you’ve changed,”… but, isn’t that the point?
92. what’s missing is empathy
We all exist at the center of our own universe, so it’s hard not to view everything from the lens of your own perspective because that’s all you’ve ever known. In an effort to create the world we want, we must not lose sight of how the actions from our singular perspective can affect others. We are effectively blind to the consequences of our actions, sometimes because we choose not to see, and other times because we can’t. In either situation, if the world we wish to create includes another person, we need to have a little more empathy for how others may see our actions. Most of the time, we all go into situations thinking only about what we want rather than what is important to that other person. It isn’t necessarily wrong, but if that person is someone who you want to place your focus on, then it is important to include how your actions may affect them. Changing your perspective in this way is a powerful way to deepen your relationships.
91. the game has changed
People used to admonish children for looking up to athletes because they just play a game, instead of thought-leaders, doctors, or policymakers who are seen as the ones working to create a better version of the world. However, the game has changed. It is now the athletes who seem to be more instrumental in having a voice that elicits change than the talking heads we are supposed to look up to.
The game is no longer played on a field, but played out in every facet of our lives. Politics has become a sport, and the unfortunate part is that because it’s a game, someone has to lose. It isn’t about improving the lives of people so they can enjoy the game, it’s only about the game. Everyone is too worried about being right to actually make a difference. The idea of either team being locked into winning at all costs is killing the hope for the greater good. It works in the context of sport, where two teams are battling to win, but it’s dangerous for real life.
People will inevitably say that it’s a dog-eat-dog world, and whoever has the best ideas will come out on top. Well, the last time I checked dogs were pack animals, and thrive only by WORKING TOGETHER.
90. certain people
Certain people come into our lives who are only meant to be there for a moment. They arrive to teach us something; sometimes it may be painful, other times it may be pleasurable, but in either instance it’s the experience that’s truly important because it serves to teach us a lesson. Unfortunately, in the process, we may attach ourselves to these people because of the idea they represent or the feelings they allow us to feel, but holding on can be detrimental. It can go against the very reason they came into our lives to begin with. What they were meant to show us can be blinded by our effort to hold on. Sometimes we need to let go to complete the experience and gain the wisdom. It’s not easy — believe me — although it is worth trading the charming torture of their presence for discovering the next best part of you. The moments we share with these people are invaluable, until they’re not. Don’t lose sight of what is really important, and that is continuous growth.
health tip: stop running away from your gainz
If you’re choosing cardio over weights, you’re literally running away from your gainz…
There are 4 metabolic ward studies — the gold standard of research — showing statistically significant reductions in resting metabolic rate when overweight subjects performed endurance exercise equivalent to a 300-600 caloric burn per day, for multiple weeks. In other words, when overweight humans do more than an hour of endurance exercise — otherwise known as steady-state cardio — daily, their resting metabolism declines an average of 5-15%.
This isn’t to say that exercise isn’t beneficial but their are better ways if you are trying to lose weight, such as sprinting or resistance training. Both of which will help to build muscle and INCREASE resting metabolic rates.
89. we have it backwards
In our system, the symbol has become more valuable than what it represents. We’ve come to value the map more than the territory it allows us to explore. Money, over the wealth it can provide. Information, over how it can educate. And, appearance, over how to capture health. We have unknowingly become more enamored with the secondary symbol, rather than the fulfillment it offers. It’s like when you go to the grocery store, gather a cart full of goodies, and roll up to the cashier. “That’ll be $86, please,” and then you get depressed because you have to give up $86 worth of symbolic paper for an actual cart full of goodies. We just think we lost $86, when the real value is what’s in the cart. We are depressed because we place more value on the symbol than what it is gained in reality. Where something like money represents potentiality, the actual wealth it allows us — i.e., the cart full of goodies — seems ordinary and necessary because we all have to eat. We have it backwards.
88. responsibility
We all fuck up sometimes. Whether through misjudgment, absent-mindedness, or sheer stupidity, these only serve as excuses, if you rely on them to be part of the story you tell. In an effort to resolve a conflict, after a mistake or failure of your doing ask yourself, “Am I distorting this situation in a way that makes myself feel like a misunderstood hero? Am I spinning the story to make myself feel better? Am I trying to play the victim to protect my ego? What were my actions that contributed to the issues at hand?”
Instead of believing that people don’t understand you, and are to blame for your failure, take responsibility for your actions. You made a mistake, fine. Say, “I fucked up.” That’s it. Simple, factual, and to the point. Own it and move on to rectifying the situation if possible. Don’t sit and try to explain it away with excuses for an hour. The truth lies in that one sentence, anything more will just produce excuses, not solutions. As soon as you start giving reasons and rationalizations, you’re trying to cover your misdeeds and protect your ego, and you’re not ready for responsibility.
87. authentic
Our culture plays the convincing game that nothing really ever happens unless it gets attention (e.g., likes or views). If you shout, and don’t year an echo, it seems like the shout didn’t happen. Doing anything today, without getting a response, is almost like it never happened. This is a real hang-up we have. We like to hear echoes — like singing in the shower, where there is more resonance — so we manufacture a persona out of what we think the world will like so that we can absorb the reverberations and know that we are somebody.
However, that somebody isn’t you. It’s not authentic. The last time anyone was truly authentic was when they were a baby. When the only thing we knew was to be uniquely ourselves, existing on desire and impulse. The process of “growing up” dissolves that authenticity because we eventually figure out that our actions play a part in the attention we receive, so we start acting differently in search of attention. But in acting a certain way to gain attention, we lose the truly authentic part of ourselves.
So we wander through life acting a certain way, not because it is who we are, but who we’ve become. No one really knows us because we haven’t been ourselves as long as we can remember. The behaviors we learned, to get the attention we were seeking have become us — the inauthentic self. Ask yourself if anyone truly knows who you are? If the answer is no, it’s because you haven’t allowed yourself to be vulnerable enough to show the world your true self.
book war: Fiber Fueled vs Fiber Menace
Fiber Fueled is written by a plant-based gastroenterologist, Fiber Menace, by a forensic nutritionist. Both hold diametrically opposed views on fiber recommendations. While Fiber Fueled praises including ever greater quantities of fiber in the diet, Fiber Menace pull no punches as to why fiver is overrated and potentially detrimental to overall health. Despite their differences, they both agree on one thing… “it is easier for our body to digest and process meat.” This is a quote from Fiber Fueled, which doesn’t give much credence to his plant-based argument, but that is a discussion for another day.
The thing everyone wants to know… how will I shit without fiber in my diet? Well, if we understand that nutrition is based on our ability to breakdown and assimilate nutrients, the simple fact that human don’t posses the digestive enzymes necessary to breakdown fiber should counter the idea that we need large amounts of fiber for regularity.
Gut motility is influenced by the content and composition of a meal, not its volume. Dense meals with high-fat content increase motility — carbs and protein have no effect. How much FIBROUS BULK you eat makes no difference because fat initiates the release of bile from the gallbladder, which then stimulates peristalsis. Pounding more fiber in hopes that it will make you shit is akin to there being traffic on the highway and thinking sending more cars down the onramp will help get things going.
That said, it is necessary for us to feed the microbes in our gut. And that is a good thing. More fiber = more diversity, but does more diversity mean better health? Fiber Fueled says yes, while Fiber Menace makes no mention (and as a fan of ancestral health, all signs point to more being better, however, I am not convinced). To get greater diversity, we need more fiber but an excess of fiber can cause greater acidity in your colon due to fermentation, which has the ability to kill off microbes.
Both books make compelling arguments fo their side, but it would be foolish to blinding accept what is being said in either, just because you want it to be true. A bit of self-experimentation is necessary to figure out where on the spectrum of fiber intake you need to be. A very simply place to start to see if you dietary plan is working or not is by utilizing the Bristol Stool Scale. If you aren’t shitting a “4” consistently, try adding or taking away some fiber for 2 weeks, depending on where you fall on the scale. Adjust accordingly.
Personally, Fiber Fueled was a waste of time because it just parrots everything you’ve already heard. “More plants, less meat.” This is dogma, and it WILL NOT work for everyone. Over the years I have ramped down my vegetable intake and have seen a rise in the quality of my digestion. When I was juicing everyday and eating grains, my body was falling apart. Fiber Fueled gets a 1 out of 5. On the other hand, Fiber Menace swings the complete opposite direction and is very refreshing to read something counterintuitive the common advice, and somehow have it vindicate my approach to a lowered fiber intake. Fiber Menace gets a 4 out of 5, and is a must read for anyone who thinks fiber is the only way to solve their digestive issues.